I Am a Single Rose…

Inspired by the time that passed by..
I’m singing a song for the one i once had in my life…
Because of the words that were hidden in my heart…
I am so afraid he’ll not understand..
And so I decide not to say…
Something that can make him go away…
I really don’t know…
That these crazy words that I tried to hide…
Are the words he wanted to hear to make him stay…
What is supposed to happen this time…
If he hears what I’m singing, will he change his mind…
Will he now choose to stay…and never leave me behind…
What is supposed to happen right now…
If he hears what I’m singing will he changed his mind…
Will he now choose to stay and never say Goodbye….????

Oh…I really don’t know…
And won’t you give me a chance…
To say those words…and make you stay for lifetime…
Dont say Goodbye…
Comeback to my life…..right now…
I will tell you…stay, I love you….

Once in my life, I met a friend. A special person who means a lot to me (can be worth as my life. yes.). We shared the same dreams…of having a simple life in a farm, of planning to ride in a boat, of having kids of maybe two or 3…we even quarrel for petty things. ..We love each other…we love each other so much because we are FRIENDS…

One night we went out…we spent time together in seashore while watching the sun slowly setting…and the water flowing into our feet. There he honestly confessed. He said…”I have this feeling, but still I have to be sure about this. I need to know if it is for real…”

I just listened…..listened while looking into his eyes and playing his fingers… (I’m used in playing his fingers and yes his feet too. I miss it…) ,then he asked me…”You, what do you feel?”…and I grabbed his hand, put it in my heart then asked him…”what is the message?” He smiled…I laughed….( this can’t be…we are BEST FRIENDS)…we ended up holding hands…( we are that sweet….but believe me we are FRIENDS)….

Since that night…we never saw each other again…he went away for a job…and I go on with my life…we became apart…

One day I discovered that he made a girl pregnant…he needs to marry her…he needs to be a father. My sister asked me if it hurts…I answered , NO, WE ARE ONLY FRIENDS…but deep inside my heart is bleeding…slowly dying. …

If only during that night I said what I really felt…and never answered him with my laughs…maybe…maybe we made that dream a true one…but not now…it is too late.
Until now we are good friends but there were times I wanted to ask…what his true feelings are though I know it is the same as what I felt BEFORE when we are BEST OF FRIENDS…

It is so sad to be late…and so late to be sad….
IT IS ALL OVER….

One night without stars
I’m in the darkness…
My heart has the saddest song…

The saddest song tonight
That time I loved him, and he loved me too.
Those countless nights like this
That time of uncounted kisses..

That time he loved me, and I loved him too
how could I not know those aching hearts ?

The saddest song tonight
His absence….

The night, so boundless without him
With a song falling on my heart, my heart slowly dying.

The love, I could no longer keep
Now , the night is full of stars, but where is he?

Faraway somewhere
My heart slowly dying…

My eyes searching for him, want him close
My heart ache for him, but where is he?

When will i love again, when I used to love so much?

Longing for his kisses
His voice, his skin and those looks

when will I love again, when it’s so long to forget?

Remember those embraces…

This will be the last pain
maybe this is the last song I will ever hear….

You are still you…in the shadowed fantasy it was difficult to be sure about it, but I believe….
Yes, I never doubt it. Not even for a single minute of your absence, you are the one…I’m living with your memories.
You are still you. In the midst of my innocent years when I don’t have the power to explain what love is for. It’s only myself that has meaning. Me, the one who want everything to turn out conveniently right only for my self. I don’t want to understand how things are.
One serene evening… you came to break this naivety, to shower me with unseen lights in the darkness, to offer me scary happiness. You don’t even have a right thing to say to lighten up my soul. But why there is a meaning? Why it’s you? And inside me I believe it’s you.
In the silence, I bothered much about a sudden wind. You are, who easily broke my hopes into pieces, which filled me with emptiness, who utter those words I can’t imagine. .. Came like a pistol shot that directly killed me.
You are you…the one who have another ideal. I wake up and I know I just make myself believe. And you don’t know anything about it… you don’t know what rhythms are…. as what I feel, as what I hear in my heart.
Now I know you can’t accept me and you are too kind to leave me alone with soft goodbye. ..But how will you know that in the depth of these emotions, I begged and said, “No, I couldn’t stand it”. How will you know that it’s painful, it’s past, it’s dead yet…it’s still you…. only you.

Your eyes make me whole,
together in a midnight stroll.
From there I see,
you and me.

In a summer breeze,
with each other at ease
Forget the past
just touch my heart.

My mate,
within my arms,
Protect each other
with the love I have.

We together
you and me.
I can make you whole.
no one can take your soul.

Feelings are wild.
by your side,
Through life,
with the love inside.

All burdens will fly

Your heart
My heart
Forever…

The shadow of the past
Oh, a chimera – a figment of my ever ripe imagination
Let me stand alone…alone..alone..
With those bloody adventure
It’s a nightmare of evil
A life with dark facets
Let me scape..run..run..
Never turn back.
I’ve lost me strength with those sleepless nights
So afraid of ghost presence.
Leave me..no..no..
I shall never forget the past..
Oh, worsening pain.
I’d rather die..
Rather die..
Die!

I am a tree….for I can’t be break by a simple hand.

I can’t be easily destroyed, only if you forced to.

My wood is hard yet you can shape me by things which are stronger like an iron tool.

You can see me standing tall just around or beside you.

But I am reachable…touch, hold or hug me.

I am productive…I am everything I want to be.

I have fruits that can solve your hunger.

I have leaves that can cure your illness.

I can bring calmness in your sight or even in your feelings.

I am green for I am a nature’s gift.

I am brown for I am a part of earth.

My strength is in the medium amount of rain and soft rays of sun.

I need love and care just like the other.

My fear is in human’s hand.

For they can stab me and caused some wound.

For they can cut  me and leave totally nothing.

In the early morning, I can send the breeze and bring shadow.

In the late night, I am  just dark and silent waiting for another day to come.

But one thing, maybe  the main reason why I am still existing

Is to tell you the memory of the past and carry it at present..

The love I can’t forget and just can’t leave…

I am a witness and in my body there is the written scar…

Of the words I LOVE YOU.

Advanced world is where we are living right now. Imagine meeting a person just by clicking and totally clicked with them without even facing. Internet is a way to communicate and web cam is the mirror of online friends. Sometimes I am wondering where is the truth in text, expressions and audibles.

What is online friend? How can you define friendship by internet?

Friendship means cooperative and supportive relationship between two humans. It involves mutual knowledge, esteem and affection and being together in times of need. Friends welcome each others company and exhibit loyalty toward each other. They usually share enjoyable activities. It is a trust that someone will not hurt them. Friendship is honesty, sympathy,truth and understanding.

Online means communicating via computer. No personal attachment but only by sending messages.

If friendship involves affection, then, it means caring words, hands to hold and arms where you can find rest…an assurance that everything will turn out right after all trouble had passed away. Supposed a connection was lost? Where to find an online friend? Can you have them near on times of trouble? Are they staying in someone’s heart and enough to imagine they are just beside?

If friendship exhibit loyalty then how to prove a person’s honesty without seeing and knowing their moves. A person can project based on the expections of others. Afterall, no eyes are watching them. There can be a big possibility of lies yet, a certain unchangeable word stay in the mind and that is "trust".

If friendship means hoping that other can’t hurt them, then, by online.. other may hurt you by word but not physically. Sometimes persons are just being so sensitive and submitting all their emotions until they become vulnerable in pain . Words can’t kill, online can’t even ruin life but sometimes it does hurt cause of longing for companionship, someone to talk and share all feelings.

Online friendship is just same as personal friendship. Both requires honesty, sympathy, truth and understanding. Maybe the difference is the physical existence . But as long as friendship depends on emotion, having friend by computer is a big thing…I’m enjoying every moment I am spending with the talk, I am more free with this friendship, I am me without any doubt or fear of rejection.

Online friends has more foundation… trust and truth….which is all in conscience.:)

Does online friendship has a capability of standing by the test of time?

The answer is:

It depends on how great the friendship is, when distance and absence can affect them no more knowing they are true friends.:)

Nagtaasan ang lahat…kakainis! Kita mo ang sitwasyon? Lumulubog na yata ang Pilipinas hindi sa lahar kundi sa konsumisyon na inaaabot ng mga mamamayan. Lahat ay umaangal na sa pagtaas ng presyo ng bigas. Bakit nga kasi naging biglaan ang lahat. Mantakin na abutin ng trenta hanggang kuwarenta pesos ang isang kilo. Meron ngang rasyon ang NFA..pero mukha namang tinitipid ang lahat. Balita ko nga marami pang ibang bigas na tinatago…hoarding. Saka lang ilalabas para sa mas mataas na presyo. Masaklap ang inaabot ni Juan de la Cruz sa kamay ng kapwa nya. Naghihirap na ay hinihila pa lalo pababa. Kasi! Ewan ko ba. Ugaling Pinoy ata. Minsan nakakahiya na tawaging Pinoy. Kasi kahit alam mo na hindi ka involve sa mga kasakimang ginagawa ng kalahi mo..alam mo pa rin na kakabit mo ang pagiging isa sa kanila. Sana pwedeng maging iba sa lahat..if possible maglaho na lang sa earth para mapagtakpan mo kung anong dugo ang nasa yo. Wish ko lang…

Balita rin na tataas na rin ang mga tinapay. Wag naman sana…okay lang na lumiit ang size kasi baka mabigla ang lahat. Nakinig ako ng usapan kahapon ng mga matatanda. Nagkaumpukan kasi..laman ng usapan ang paghihirap. Ayon sa kanila ay pag- aaralan na lang raw nila na kumain ng tinapay, hindi na sila magbibigas! Nakakatawa di ba? Kaawaawa naman na kung kelan nagka- edad eh saka maghihirap. Makakaya ba ng bituka nila na kukunti ang laman? Aba! Kung anu -ano na ang naiisipang pagtitipid ng lahat! Sana may malaking speaker na nagkalat sa bawat parte ng Pilipinas… baka kasi sakaling marinig ng mga dapat makaalam ng pag -atungal ng mga Pilipino. Baka naman nanigas na parang adobe na ang mag tutuli nila? Dapat siguro ay hukayin na ang mga tenga para naman makarinig. Ah, di nga pala sapat na nakabukas ang tenga..dapat silang makaramdam. Eh, pano namang makakaramdam? Umuuwi sila sa kani - knilang tahanan at nahihiga sa malalambot na kama..at dahan - dahang nakakalimot sa sitwasyon ng iba.

Puro na lang kasi pasarap, bangayan at palakasan ngayon sa gobyerno. Maanong magpasa naman ng batas na tutulong sa mga nakadapang Pinoy. Di ba nila nakikita ang kahit na gatiting na pag- asa na natitira?

Kagabi lang nga nanggagalaiti na kami sa usapan ng kapatid ko, ang ibang mga palay eh nangangabulok na sa mga probinsya. Hindi binibigyan ng enough interest ng government. Bakit di nila subukang magbigay ng higit na fund para sa rice growing? Bakit ba mas inuuna nila ang mag-import from other countries? Totoo ba na mas makakamura by this way or mas malaki ang komisyon na nakukuha nila? Hindi ko na nga alam kung ano ang iisipin ko as a concerned citizen. Di nyo naman ako masisisi dahil unang una, alam ng lahat ang issue about Broadband Deal. Sino ba ang mas nakinabang dito?

Bakit kasi sa halip na mag - focus sa paghihirap ng kapwa eh mas inuuna ang pagkapal ng bulsa?
Bakit sa halip na bigyang pansin ang kumakalam na sikmura ng nakararami ay mas inuuna ang pagbibigay pansin sa kapangyarihan at pagbibigay ng higit na pondo sa mga sundalo? Marahil eh naghahanap ng kakampi ang gobyerno sa ngalan ng mga sundalo o militar. Sabagay, sino nga ba ang mas dapat kapitan kundi ang may mga armas. Pero sana, hindi maliit na porsyento lang ng mamamayan ang makinabang sa kaban ng bayan samantalang ang iba ay unti - unti nang nangangayayat sa paghihintay ng maisusubo….

Hoy! Kilos! Tama na ang payabangan!Tama na pangangamkam!Tama na makasariling layunin!
Isipin ang iba…iahon ang taong bayan sa kagipitan…MARAMI NA ANG NAGUGUTOM NA PINOY!!Maawa naman kayo sa naghihirap na si Juan!